@nebulon Oh sorry, yes that was a command I found online which I thought was neat, haha. It just combines processes with the same name which I think is useful at times, so it's basically a summary of all MySQL services, all Node servers, etc.
Thanks for the assistance by the way - I know I'm deviating a bit from the original concern so that's okay - we can probably mark this resolved now since limiting the backup task memory was sufficient for now. It just has me wondering about memory usage overall on my system now. haha. I'll maybe file a new post if I need a bit more insight later to memory stuff. Thanks again for the help!
For reference, here is the current status of those commands:
ubuntu@my:~$ free -h
total used free shared buff/cache available
Mem: 14Gi 5.3Gi 797Mi 925Mi 8.2Gi 7.8Gi
Swap: 4.0Gi 3.0Mi 4.0Gi
(there was 2.2 GB free when I woke up this morning but little left now because it just completed a backup, so hoping that memory gets put back - but wondering if maybe this is why it's going to low in "free" memory (even though plenty left in "available" memory).
ubuntu@my:~$ ps axo rss,comm,pid | awk '{ proc_list[$2] += $1; } END \
> { for (proc in proc_list) { printf("%d\t%s\n", proc_list[proc],proc); }}' | sort -n | tail -n 20 | sort -rn | awk '{$1/=1024;printf "%.0fMB\t",$1}{print $2}'
5793MB /usr/sbin/apach
1958MB node
1070MB ruby2.7
903MB mysqld
716MB supervisord
476MB containerd-shim
327MB spamd
236MB redis-server
179MB postmaster
170MB nginx
139MB mongod
133MB dockerd
121MB uwsgi
81MB imap
65MB systemd-udevd
61MB containerd
59MB imap-login
44MB radicale
39MB carbon-cache
36MB snapd
Definitely a lot more Apache-related memory usage (which I guess is just all the containers running Apache like all the WordPress sites for example and makes sense as most of the apps running are WordPress apps in Cloudron). MySQL memory also almost doubled, but since so many are WordPress sites and if they're getting busier I suspect that means more MySQL usage which means MySQL will use more memory, so I think that all checks out still.
One thing I'm not sure I fully understand yet (but maybe this is a bit outside the scope of Cloudron) is the memory part... so last night I had 4.0 GB used and 4.8 GB in the free column, now it's 5.3 GB used but the free memory dropped by about 4 GB to 797 MB from 4.8 GB last night. That's where I get a bit confused and unsure why that goes so low when the memory usage only went up a bit. I believe it basically becomes "reserved" and then used in the "buff/cache" and when no longer used it's still reserved so becomes "available", is that right do you think?